Am I Asking the Right Question?

Recently a group of ladies from our church met to study the Bible. One lady who had not attended for a long time made the comment that it is so easy to be a hermit sometimes, (rather than get out).  That comment has rolled around in my mind for several days not just because of the truth of it, but wondering why it true. At times, the answer is: because it is easier or more comfortable to stay at home than making the effort to get out. 

Then a memory came to mind of a time quite a number of years ago when I was considering whether to become involved in a group.  I told the person I was talking to that I didn’t know that we would really benefit enough from the group to warrant getting involved.  Her answer caught me off guard, “did you ever think that someone may need what you have to offer?”  My thoughts had centered on what I could gain instead of what I could give.

Are there sometimes legitimate reasons to stay home?  Certainly!  Can we be involved in everything that is available?  No!  The challenge here is that you ask God where and when He wants you to be involved to encourage or bless someone by your participation.  As one writer stated, “it’s not about me”.

To come back to the beginning, that evening when we shared prayer requests, one lady was weighed down with a burden.   God used our prayers that night to work in the situation to bring an answer, and the one who had been tempted to be a hermit was the one lead to pray for her.  The burdened woman was blessed, we all were encouraged, and God received the glory. 

 

This is also a reminder of why we chose the name, TLC, and that we can make a difference for eternity.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Who Am I, Really?

How would you answer that question, who am I?  Wife of ___.  Mother of ____.  Employee of _____.  Head of ____.  Or does it lead you to compare yourself to someone else, thereby thinking less of yourself because you are not ________ (you fill in the blank).  Today, as I read the introduction of I Corinthians, I was blown away, again, by the identity we have in Christ.  In only nine verses, Paul reminds the Christ follower that he is:

·         Sanctified in Christ (set apart and considered holy because of Christ’s work on our behalf)

·         Saints by calling (Yes, you read that right.  All Christ followers are called saints, but not because of our efforts or worthiness)

·         Part of the church around the world (can’t wait to meet them all in heaven)

·         Recipients of God’s grace (grace upon grace!)

·         Enriched in Him (it says He even enriches our speech!)

·         Not lacking in any gift (gift is the same word as grace!)

·         Eagerly waiting for the return of Christ (what a day that will be!)

·         Sustained to the very end (such encouragement and hope that brings)

·         Guiltless in the day of Jesus Christ (again, all and only because of Him!)

Nine truths in nine verses that tell us who we are.  In the end, no other identity  - or lack of identity in my mind - really matters.  So what will my response be to this? 

What did you feed to others today?

You might answer that question a hundred different ways:  pizza, chili, peanut butter and jelly sandwiches fried chicken, to name a few. What if the question read, “what words did you feed others today”?  The first part of Proverbs 10:21 says, the lips of the righteous feed many…  Let’s consider for a moment the food that can come from our lips which bring nourishment to the soul and spirit. 

God’s words:  the most important words we could ever share, whether an actual quote or sharing a scriptural principle. 

Words of praise (versus flattery) focus on the character or right conduct of the individual. That was very kind of you to run that errand for me.  Your honesty was a good example and challenge to me.  God tells us to build up one another, (I Thes. 5:11) which means to promote growth in Christian wisdom, affection, grace, virtue, and holiness.  Praise does that.

Words of appreciation:  when we express gratitude to another we acknowledge how their kind word or deed was valuable and blessed us. 

Words of truth develop and promote a trusting relationship.  Coupled with love, (Eph. 4:15), they provide a gentle correction when appropriate, or a different focus when “they can’t see the forest for the trees”.

Words of encouragement are needed by everyone at times.  We urge you, brethren, admonish the unruly, encourage the fainthearted (discouraged), help the weak, be patient with everyone…I Thes. 5:14

Words of prayer:  a true gift whether offered for them or with them. 

Let’s go back to the verse we began with and look at the last word, the lips of the righteous feed many…, Our words have a ripple effect and can touch and bless many lives - now and in the days to come. 

So what are you going to serve up today?  Make it a bountiful buffet of praise, appreciation, truth, encouragement, prayer, and scripture(God’s words), that will satisfy the pickiest eater.

How Salty Are My Words?

Let's review the key verse stated in the last post, introducing the topic of gracious speech.  Let your speech always be with grace, as though seasoned with salt, so that you will know how you should respond to each person. Colossians 4:6 (Now this is not talking about the salty speech of a sailor!). Speech is being compared to food flavorfully seasoned with salt.  You have tasted foods seasoned with too little salt or too much salt.  Neither is as enjoyable as if it was seasoned with just the right amount.  If our speech does not have enough "salt", it is boring or bland, uninteresting.  Words seasoned with too much "salt" might be overbearing, hard to get down, or almost gagging.  The intended meaning of the words might even be lost. Remember the meaning of gracious words given last time; giving joy, pleasure, delight?  Neither extreme, too little salt or too much salt, fit that description.   Though this passage seems to relate specifically, and perhaps most importantly, to the testimony our words give,  it is applicable in all situations.

 

So how do we add zest to bland and uninteresting words?  We might ask questions, discover what interests the other person, or keep abreast of current happenings in the world to lead to interesting conversation.   Think about someone you know that you enjoy talking to.  What makes conversation with them stimulating?

What about the other extreme - words that are too salty? Watch how people respond to your words.  Do they shut down or react in some other way? If the Holy Spirit brings a particular situation to your remembrance,  do a replay in your mind and think about how it would sound if someone spoke to you like you spoke to them.  (Just don't let it become a broken record!)  Be alert for good examples you can learn from.

What if we don't know if our speech, in general, has too much or not enough "salt"?  Ask for input from a good trusted friend or two.  In all of these situations, ask God to show you and teach you how to let your speech be as delightful as savory, well-seasoned food. That makes for gracious words.

Are My Words Gracious?

If you chose to read this because you thought you could get all the answers on how to speak graciously, you have come to the wrong place.  Over the past several weeks, the Lord has impressed on my heart that this is what he wants me to focus on in 2015.  So if you would like to come along to learn, share insights or pose questions, you are welcome!  We hope to do some “iron sharpening” and encourage each other along the way.

 

Let’s start in the best place – the Book, Basic Instructions Before Leaving Earth, (an interesting acronym for BIBLE).  Colossians 4:6 NASB, Let your speech be always with grace, as though seasoned with salt, so that you may know how to answer each person. Anyone else find that verse challenging? 

In the subsequent posts, I am going to pick apart this verse, refer to other related verses, and tackle related aspects of the topic of grace-filled words.  For this time though, let’s just think about, and chew on the description of gracious speech taken from BlueletterBible.org; words which afford joy, pleasure, delight, sweetness, charm, and loveliness.

 

Benefits of Believing Romans 8:28

We say we believe Romans 8:28, one of the most familiar promises in the Bible.  But a question then comes to mind:  if I truly believe this promise, would I allow my mind to stay in worry and/or fear?  How would it help us believe this promise more fully by pondering the benefits that come when we do? 

This is a list complied as we met to mine the nuggets of truth found in Romans 8:28.  It is by no means an exhaustive list and it would be great to add more so feel free to add your insights. 

What will happen if I believe that God is working all things together for the good of those who love Him?

      1.       It will free me from the temptation to blame/condemn someone or something else.

2.       It gives me an opportunity to praise God as I look back to see what He did.

3.       It provides an opportunity to share with others what He has done; whether a witness to the unbeliever or an encouragement to the believer.

4.       It reveals God’s power and sovereignty.

5.       It provides a training opportunity for our children.

6.       It prevents or overcomes bitterness.

7.       It strengthens my faith as I trust Him.  “Look at your life situation.  Then look at your powerful and redemptive God and the promise of Romans 8:28.  When you do, you have another decision to make – a decision of faith – to put your trust in God and believe that the end will be good regardless of how life looks or feels in the present.”  Elizabeth George in Loving God with All your Mind. 

8.       We have peace and hope.

9.       We can move forward in boldness and confidence.

10.   God uses it to develop godly character as He conforms us to the image of His Son.

11.   Guides us into acceptance of the situation.

The testimony of the prolific hymn writer, Fanny Crosby, demonstrates her belief in this promise.  This is what she said regarding the doctor who caused her blindness.  “Although it may have been a blunder on the physicians’ part, it was no mistake on God’s.  I verily believe it was His intention that I should live my days in physical darkness, so as to be better prepared to sing His praises and incite others to do so.”

We can see many of these benefits demonstrated in the life of Fanny in reading her testimony.  It challenges me to walk by faith (in this promise) and not by sight, (what the situations looks like). 

Two heads (or more than two) are better than one! Question for open discussion

The discussion that rose from our last TLC meeting about what it means to be a "Pollyanna" and the appropriate level of an optimistic outlook on trials and challenges was thought-provoking, rich, and meaningful, and thoroughly enjoying!

So when a question began percolating in my mind the other morning after reading a devotional, I thought, I know just the group of ladies to ask for insight and explanation!  Please allow me to pick your brain, and please, comment freely!

The classic daily devotional, Streams in the Desert, says (and I have heard it phrased slightly differently and other variations of the thought many other times):

 "We all know how impossible it is to rescue a drowning man who tries to help his rescuer, and it is equally impossible for the Lord to fight our battles for us when we insist upon trying to fight them ourselves.  It is not that He will not, but He cannot.  Our interference hinders his working."

Why would a Christian ever say that we hinder God in any manner?  Can man ever hinder God or be in His way?  What are we saying when we say things like that?  Surely we're not saying anything is impossible for God, or that He cannot do something.   It would be like saying that the tiniest black sugar ant in my kitchen hinders me from doing the dishes.

 

Ladies, what do we really mean when we say that God can't work without our cooperation, or that we are in His way?

Does God want me to be a Pollyanna?

We're familiar with the verse, For I know the plans that I have for you,' declares the Lord, 'plans for welfare and not for calamity to give you a future and a hope. (Jeremiah 29:11 NASB)  But as we explored, discussed and dissected this verse, many principles were shared, words defined and questions asked.  Indeed, the discussion was lively.  Because of the truth that God's plans are good, and He has given us a wonderful future and secure hope, the question was presented, "Do I speak of the future pessimistically or optimistically?  This lead to, "How do I respond to the doom and gloom naysayer?" Or on the other hand, "What about the accusation that someone is just a Pollyanna, viewing life unrealistically?"  Here are the thoughts that Joyce jotted down afterwards that she gave permission to share here.

I often drive home from TLC pondering the things that were shared. Last night I was thinking about what was said about being "Pollyannaish" (thanks, Jan for the thought provoking question). I began wondering if I really understood what that meant, so I Googled it (when I got home, not while I was driving!). I felt compelled to write down the thoughts that came to me. Here they are if anyone is interested in my ramblings:

Pollyannaish

From Wikipedia.com
1) someone who seems always to be able to find something to be "glad" about no matter what circumstances arise
2) someone whose optimism is excessive to the point of naïveté or refusing to accept the facts of an unfortunate situation

From UrbanDictionary.com
3) Belittling and often insulting term for being absurdly optimistic and good-hearted, believing in a good world where everything works out for the best all the time. Often in combination with being God-fearing and perceiving oneself standing on a higher moral ground than others

If we are considering definition #1, then I agree that we should, like Pam said, "be Pollyannaish about God" (thanks for sharing that Pam). We can always find something to be thankful for and should strive to focus on God's goodness no matter what circumstances arise. I agree with that wholeheartedly. I said last night that "No one would ever accuse me of being a Pollyanna," but that's not really true. One example is when one of my sister's was diagnosed with cancer I was saddened by the news, but not devastated because I was thankful that she is a Christian and I knew that God would use her and the situation for His glory (and He did). One family member did not share my view and accused me of being unconcerned and uncaring. There wasn't much I could say to change her perspective, and I didn't allow her to change mine. I did try to let her know that I really did share her love and concern for my sister.

It was something more like definition #2 and #3 that sparked my initial response as that has been more my experience. I have been both the offender of and the one offended by the attitude that is described in Proverbs 25:20, Like one who takes away a garment in cold weather, And like vinegar on soda, Is one who sings songs to a heavy heart

For many years I perceived myself standing on a higher moral ground than others, judging others as not being God-fearing because they were struggling with a circumstance in their life that saddened them or concerned them. Instead of coming alongside and "sorrowing with those who sorrow" I poured vinegar on their wounds with my patronizing words disguised as encouragement. God used my struggle with infertility to reveal this in myself, and He's still working on me.

Let me just add, so there's no misunderstanding, I'm not saying that we should condone any sinful attitudes or behaviors in others or ourselves. One missionary told me once that there is no excuse for bad behavior, but there's almost always an explanation. I'm grateful for the women who have come along side me, listened, got to know me and helped me understand why I struggled with certain areas so that I could replace the wrong thinking that was triggering them with truth. I thank the Lord for how He has progressed me; it's only by His grace. Still a long way to go though...

So, if someone was to "accuse me of being a Pollyanna" I would have to examine whether it is because they do not share my eternal perspective of hope in God, or is it because they are sensing that I do not care enough about them to allow them to share their perspective.

I appreciate all of you and how God made each one of us different. I am thankful for how God is using each of you in my life.

Joyce

What's Got You Worried?

Matt. 6:25-34   Our desire in this study is to understand that worry prevents us from seeking to advance His Kingdom.

I.                    Results of Worry

A.      Accomplishes nothing! (except stress, negative effect on health,  strained relationships)   V. 27 What positive or productive thing has ever been accomplished by my worries?

B.      Demonstrates lack of faith because we don’t believe what God says or we don’t trust Him.  V. 30 

C.      Shows us acting like the world which in turn affects our testimony to others.  V. 32.  Does my conversation reveal to others an attitude of worry or of trust?

 

II.                  Reasons not to Worry - What is the truth in this situation? (Phil 4:8)

A.      God is our provider (28-30) How has God provided for me recently?

B.      God knows what we need because He is omniscient.  (32)  What do you know that God doesn’t know?

C.      God is righteous (33) He will give us what is right in every sense of the word.  His way is correct.

D.     God is our Sovereign God, ruler, King (33).  What He decrees happens, what He decides comes to pass.

E.      God is our heavenly Father who loves and cares for His children.

Which attribute will help me most to meditate on in this situation that has me worried?

III.                Replacement for Worry – Instead of worrying, we are to seek His kingdom and righteousness.  (33)  How do we do that? 

How do we seek (strive for, aim for His rule)  His kingdom? 

A.       Submit to His rule and reign in our own heart.  I.e. instead of worrying about ________ I yield it to God’s desire and plan.  Elizabeth George emphasizes the importance of time alone with God in prayer to get his perspective and ordering of the day.  Her summary of verses 33 is “deal with today” in order to help us win over worry.  She gives 5 keys to winning over worry:  Prepare, Plan, Pray, Proceed and Trust God to Provide.  She shares how she used these steps in battle worry as she faced the possibility of her husband going oversees in the Persian Gulf War.  She has another chapter on how these 5 keys can help in dealing with today when you face ongoing suffering on a daily basis. (From the book, Love the Lord with All Your Mind)

B.      Desire to see His rule in the lives of others.  I.e. it might be to pray for ____ to follow God’s direction.  In other situations it might be to teach and encourage a friend to follow God’s (the King’s) way.

C.      Participation in the growth of God’s Kingdom.  I.e. personal witness (share with others how God was worthy of my trust and how He alone could meet my needs.)  Is there a way God wants me to get involved in being part of solution instead of worrying about it. 

How do we seek His righteousness? God’s righteousness is a moral correctness of thinking, feeling, and acting

A.    Correct thinking – Phil 4:8; Finally, brethren, whatever is true, ….dwell on these things.      Correct feeling – Heb. 1:9, “You have loved righteousness and hated lawlessness; Therefore God, Your God, has anointed You With the oil of gladness above Your companions.”                                                                                                         Correct acting – Heb. 11:33 who by faith conquered kingdoms, performed acts of righteousness, obtained promises, shut the mouths of lions…

B.      Be trained in it through His Word –II Tim 3:16 All Scripture is inspired by God and profitable for teaching, for reproof, for correction, for training in righteousness;

C.      Practice it – I John 2:29 If you know that He is righteous, you know that everyone also who practices righteousness is born of Him.

Another quote by Mrs. George:  “When you being to live out the command of Matt 6:33, Seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness, and then you begin to realize the promise of Matthew 6:33, the promise of God’s provision of all that you need… the truth that make it possible for you to win over worry- and all these things shall be added to you.”

Will I worry or will I use it as an opportunity to seek the advancement His Kingdom and righteousness?

In what situation in your life right now is God giving you that choice?

 

 

 

It's What We Think that Matters

The following is the way the Holy Spirit worked in my heart when preparing for the most recent TLC Bible study.  I hope it blesses you the way the study blessed me.  Joy Wade

Philippians 4:8&9 NASB95 Finally, brethren, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is of good repute, if there is any excellence and if anything worthy of praise, dwell on these things. The things you have learned and received and heard and seen in me, practice these things, and the God of peace will be with you.

The Apostle Paul is writing to the church at Philippi.  In these selected scriptures, Paul appears to be finishing up a thought, “Finally”.  What follows is a list of adjectives which are the boundaries for what one’s mind should be focused upon. In other words, if a thought or line of thinking cannot be described by one or more of these adjectives, then a believer is NOT to dwell on that.  In contrast Paul says purposefully choose to focus on thoughts that fall into these categories, letting your thinking dwell, or “live” in that place.

Obviously this is not a new concept to the Philippians.  Paul says he taught these principles to them, they understood them and they saw him practice this type of focus while in their presence. He further commands them to practice this kind of thinking. The result is that God’s peace is with the believer who chooses to dwell on this kind of thinking.  

God knows what kind of thinking will keep the believer at peace with Him and in their hearts.  He led the apostle Paul to give us a list to follow.

The parameters Paul is giving are to help me guard my thoughts so that they are in line with the thinking of Christ.  Thoughts that are true, honorable, right, pure, lovely, of good repute, contain excellence or worthy of praise are to be those parameters.  This is a practice I must choose to come back to when I find my thinking in dark, critical, judgmental, malicious, deceitful, depressing, untrue, fearful, lustful, evil or just plain lousy places.  If I am struggling to be obedient to this, I am to throw myself on the mercy of the throne of grace (Heb.4:16) and ask God to help me to have the strength to think on things He approves of.  Christ understands my weaknesses.  It’s not how many times I fail that God focuses on; it’s how many times I look to Him to pull me out of the pit I’ve fallen (or jumped) into.   

Once I’ve found victory over my thinking and am focused on Christ’s type of thinking, I need to let my mind stay there.  I dwell in a house; when the weather got so cold, the wind was blowing and the snow was falling, I chose to stay inside my house and not leave it.  Likewise, I need to keep my thinking inside the safe, warm “house” of the mind of Christ. This means keeping the door of my thinking closed to the outside influences If the thinking of the world, my sin nature or Satan tries to squeeze through the cracks, I must discipline my mind to turn my attention to thoughts that meet this criteria. There are times when I must honestly admit this is extremely difficult to do.  It is in those times that I just cry out to the Lord to change my heart and my thinking.

Paul told the Philippians to think about the example he set for them in practicing this kind of thinking when he was with them.  So therefore I must choose to be around people and learn from people who practice this in their life. Praise the Lord that He gave me just such a man as my husband, but also, I need friends who are willing to gently correct my thinking if they judge it to be distorting of God’s position. I must be willing to hear a gentle correction. (If I won’t listen to the gentle correction then I may find myself facing a harsh correction.)  I find when I seek to learn from and be around the person who practices godliness, I can be convicted where I am going astray and encouraged to follow their example of Christ centered thinking.  This takes me to Paul’s next commandment of “practicing”.

Something that must be practiced is something that is a learned habit, not a natural one.  Thus it doesn’t come naturally to the believer to think in this manner. If this is a new concept, then I’ve got to practice it. I mustn’t fool myself or allow myself to be lulled into a false sense of having “attained” it.  Satan, the world and my own sin nature never take a vacation.  They are always finding new ways to try to lead me astray in my thinking and actions. I need to often go back to the “text” book in order examine if my thinking lines up.  I need to ask the Holy Spirit to convict me of thinking that isn’t led by Him.  I need to find time to quietly listen to His leadings and convictions.  I must be willing to obey when I find Him trying to lead my thinking to the acceptable place as described by Paul.

Lack of peace, unrest, fear, grumpiness, critical “harsh” thinking, dissatisfaction with others, depression, lingering self-pity, indecisiveness on moral issues, feeling pushed, confused, discouraged, worried, obsessed or condemned are all “red flags” that my thinking is not lined up with God’s thinking.  I am in the throes of living without God’s perspective, which is tantamount to being without the peace of God.  However, the practice of this kind of thinking is going to produce in me the Peace of God and that is the peace that passes all understanding. 

These are questions for applying what I’ve learned and keeping myself accountable.

1.      Is this True?
            Honorable?
            Right?
            Pure?
            Lovely?
            Of good repute? (promoting the good reputation of my Savior)
            Excellent
            Worthy of Praise?

2.      Whose voice does it reflect?

God’s Voice   vs.  Satan’s Voice

Stills you              Rushes you

Leads                    Pushes

Reassures           Frightens

Enlightens           Confuses

Encourages         Discourages

Comforts             Worries

Calms                    Obsesses

Convicts               Condemns

3.       Am I at peace, content, courageous, assured, calm?